Rosaline Honeycock

By now this may seem like a standard reflex of my personality to some of my closer friends, but I’d really like to see Nicholas Sparks fuck someone. Preferably it’d be on numerous occasions with different people like, say, his wife; then perhaps a man to challenge his latent homophobia; and then with multiple partners simultaneously.

Like Manmeet — an ultra-conservative girl I went to high school with — it’s something about the way Nicholas speaks, his all American look, the way he’s so easily amused by the novelty of seemingly unusual situations, and the success he’s found as an author pandering to middle aged women (despite how terribly he writes, if not because of it), that makes me so intrigued about his sex life.

Sexuality tends to provide such rich nuances to a person’s character, or rather, what we perceive of a person’s character. The way a person physically expresses themself during such intimate and often vulnerable moments with another person makes for a pretty dramatic departure from the person we’re accustomed to seeing as they go about their day to day, and often mundane, lives.